Like a Rock {A Song in Thought}

Since August, I have been in perpetual motion. I have not taken a breather, not a real one at least. Yes, being a Convention Services Manager for the third largest hotel can be quite daunting. But to face professionals 20+ years your senior, and look them in their eyes, stand up for and sometimes FIGHT for your way, can be humbling.

I learned from a sweet Little Birdie that not only was the quality of my work perceived to be slipping, but my personal capabilities were under question. In 2 months I had to flip the script on these people because I KNOW I am better than that.

"I jog in the graveyard,
Spar in the same ring.
I was housed by the building where Malcolm X was slain.

I spring train in the winter,
Round early December.
Run suicide drills over and over.

With the weight of the world on my shoulder -
that's why they call me 'Hova' -
I'm far from being God, but I work god-damned hard."

--S. Carter

All in all, I am glad to say that I have recovered as a polished professional eager to learn: as cliche as that sounds. I want to absorb and grow as much as possible, and for the first time in my life, I bit a piece of humble pie. And I must say I am all the better for it.

Literally, I was brow-beaten and weathered, and I was known to describe myself as a 'shell of the woman I used to be'. Better still, I emerge confidently and excited.

At times, I miss the random-ness of New York and especially LIC. The openness of experience and the welcoming comfort of mutual sentiment despite huge differences. Moving back to DC is certainly not for naught.

"An upside down kingdom where life is just not fair.
So many suffering 'cause deep inside they're scared.
Fear pumped into their veins to keep them from their destiny.
Where would they be if you and I don't care?"--MJB ("I Try f/ Talib Kweli)

Here, in my home, I am able to look at what 'building' this life means. I am able to look to the future, and hopefully in time engage in the present that was so miraculously apparent 212 miles to the north.

I look forward to it all though. And if nothing else, I have learned to smile through it all - at least you'll look better
:D

"Life is a beautiful struggle:
People search through the rubble for a suitable hustle.

Some people using their noodle...
Some people using their muscle...
Some people put it all together, make it fit like a puzzle.

(Come on, Say it now)
Life is a beautiful struggle:
People search through the rubble for a suitable hustle.

Some people using their noodle...
Some people using their muscle...
Some people put it all together, yeah. --T. Kweli